You know how people try to “bless shame” others, calling them out on a humble brag? Well, I guess there’s some truth to that, but when I’m closing out on 39, reflecting on my little corner of this universe, how else can i describe my life? Imperfect- yes. Present with struggles- yes. Not the most healthy- yes. Trying to maneuver parenting- yes. Raising a teenager- yes. But BLESSED? – YYYYESSSS! Our lives are not problem free- from drama in church, to having our pastor resign, to raising a 13 year old with crushes and motivating the girls to be their better selves, to living on a one income household, to holding onto our commitments in ministry while trying to encourage the body to keep serving, to bodies that ache, to dealing with familial struggles outside of our home, to keeping up with menial household responsibilities to upkeep our house’s needs, while maintaining a balance for our family to connect and make lasting memories. But I cling to God’s goodness, that we have a home, we are fed, we get sleep. Our kids go to a great school where their teachers care so much for their education, where they have strong […]
Happy birthday, Emmanuelle Grace. Today has come too fast. What I once thought was eons away has quickly eluded me and stands closely in front of me requiring acknowledgement. You’re 13. You’re beautiful and deep, and you constantly try to figure out how to grow up and understand more of your observations. Know that you are surrounded by people who are fast to love. You will be met with people to cheer you on. We love you, Monkey and pray your birthday verses with you. We are so proud of who you are. ? asdf?Some Favorites: Clothes: Maxi Dresses, TShirt + Leggings, Poofy Tulle Skirts Food: Bacon, Fried Pork Belly, Shrimp, Salmon, Pizza @ the mall, taro bubble tea slush, Nutella Instrument: Violin, Uke, Voice TV Shows: Fuller House, Star Vs. Forces of Darkness, Nick Shows Movies: Mamma Mia “HWGA”, “Greatest Showman”, Pitch Perfect 3 Songs: Mamma Mia Soundtrack, Greatest Showman Soundtrack, Kina Grannis, Songwriter Vibes, Imagine Dragons, Pitch Perfect 3 Soundtrack Color: Tiffany Blue Hobbies: Listen to music, Singing, texting friends, Indoor rock climbing, rollerblading, writing songs, playing her uke, Playing Pokemon, Loves: Musicals, Swimming, Washi Tape, Sleepovers, Places: Beach, B+N, Target Notables: She continues to write songs. On my […]
There were 16 people in the room. No music. My father walked me down the aisle. I wore borrowed shoes, some make up, and a fifteen dollar necklace. My siblings bought my wedding dress, and my brother and one of Perze’s best friends took our pictures. We wrote our own vows and I cried straight through my words and his. Our pastor’s wife thoughtfully put lace on the floor of the altar, and my mom adorned it with 2 vases of white roses. The men wore Barongs. The plant that Pastor speaks of these last few Sundays were alive and lush. Every year we go back to that simple day and when we come back to the present, we are in awe with what has transpired since then. Fourteen years of love unfolding. To God be the glory.
(Pictured: Zienne reading the biography of JK Rowling. She just bought the book yesterday night + she can’t put it down. Here, she’s waiting for the bus while reading. She is very into biographies like Elleonai.) Little Story: We went to BN last night + bumped into one of the Bears’ teachers. She showed us the book she bought + explained she had bought it because of the unique texture of the cover. Then she mentioned how upset her husband will be with her for buying another children’s book, since their children have all grown up and moved out. That thought lingered. Bigger Story: I could picture myself in 20-30 years, collecting books that remind me so much of the books that are sacredly romancing their minds and hearts. That future nostalgia’s gonna be killer. Each of my daughters loves certain types of books, and it intrigues me how these books are helping to build the constructs of their imagination and reality, giving a glimpse of what they deem important enough that it keeps calling them for more of their interest and attention. Just like their clothes that they gravitate to, somewhat helping to identify their personality, books give insight […]
Moments that I sincerely cherish. When out of the blue, one of them just serves the other. Zienne has been learning the uke because she looks up to Emma + Emma taught her a few chords. Today, while waiting for Emma during violin lessons, we stayed outside and Zienne started teaching Elle. My girls are natural teachers.
We’re so proud of Emma for being one of the featured duets in her spring concert. Even more so, we’re proud of the courage she overcame, bringing her talents to a new School, where the pool of musicians really challenged her to become better as well. She mustered up the strength to become friends with her musical peers, be noticed by her teachers, show everyone her passion for music, and tackle challenging music to perform. The concert was also a personal treat for me since her chamber orchestra played Dvorak’s heartbreaking Cavatina, and the 7/8th graders played Mozart’s heart racing Amadeus- first introduced to me back in high school when the movie came out + I became obsessed with the soundtrack.
Our beloved Zienne turns 9 today. ? It’s funny; the moment I first laid my eyes upon her, my mind automatically raced to the future, and in a millisecond, I wondered what her smile will look like, how her voice will sound like, what idiosyncrasies will she develop. Then when she gets older, I forcibly make my mind focus only on the moments of her birth, longing to remember her scent, the tiny coos of unfamiliarity, her confused gazes to the world around around her, and the small changes of her visage. We have come to NINE, + as much as I go back to her birth day, I look at who she is now and rejoice. Zienne is my little budding perfectionist- in school, in music, in learning new skills- she chases after things with fervor. Her resolve is so admirable. But what I love most this year is Zienne’s growth in opening up. Zi is more reserved, observant and analytical. But this year, her mind is starting to verbalize how she makes sense of her world through her feelings, and I love the new dimensions in our dialogue, a deeper understanding of how she processes things and how […]