I have this persistent fear that comes every now and then. It starts from the very pit of my core every time anxiety over something I’m scared of going through enters my brain. The rest of my body follows the path that eventually leads in palpitations and imaginary scenarios of the worst things that can happen.

Then my faith surges and tries to wield off my head, to get my body to calm down. For the most part, the best it can do is calm the surface, but I know the fears are all still there, as real as the present.

This has been my new norm last year, and I keep reminding myself that this life isn’t mine, and this life is temporary. I can only live for today and give abounding thanks for what I have been blessed with. Grace- that ever so fine strings that holds me up. As I get older, the more I fear.

Like tonight, sometimes I can’t even say what I fear although I can readily make up a list as I go. I just don’t want to give them a name to write out.

It will pass. It will pass. And after a time, old fears won’t seem as huge, and they will make way for newer thoughts.

 

[ forgive the grammatical mistakes; i hate editing creative writing stuff ]