Today, we saw a man about our house, to assess whether it can be easily sold so that we can proceed in purchasing another home in our preferred area. The good news is that he knows he can sell our house quickly if we adhere to his conditions. Discussing the market for buying and selling, the inventory of houses that fit our bucket list, the time frame of staging our home for an open house, and getting finances in order seemed too overwhelming for people whose forte isn’t in this area. But he assured us it can be done.
But on the other hand, all the what ifs linger around us like moths to a flame, persistent and causing doubt, letting us be more aware of its presence more than hope. So many factors.
But then I’m reminded of the factor that people often don’t verbalize- God’s timing. We have been praying for moving, for a house to be on the market, for our house to get sold, etc. And as much as we know it’s all in God’s timing, sometimes, it doesn’t come as tangibly as we’d like.
Tonight, my middle daughter was playing the piano, practicing the right hand to “Beauty and the Beast”. She had asked me to teach her the song, as they all are terribly fond of the live movie, and even more recently, its musical score. Tonight, I decided to teach her the left hand’s part, the chords that partner the melody. Now, for beginners, I have to reduce the left hand to playing only the chord in first position on the first beat, to simplify the piece until the learner is familiar with playing both parts together. Naturally, my daughter gets too excited to master the tune, that she diminishes the the integrity of giving the left hand its due time to play before the right hand plays the melody, and thus rushing the timing of the song completely. So with mild frustration, I have to remind her to “honor the timing.” She needs to learn how to give that left hand its four beats to the measure, while having the right hand wait a little sometimes, so when played together, it is the song in perfection- how it’s meant to be played and heard.
As I said those words, I was reminded, like a fool (which is the usual case), that I need to “honor the timing.” I have to trust that God is teaching me that the song meant to play out, the one He is composing for me, is in perfect time. It is completely and dance of playing and waiting, and intersecting- playing together. But I cannot rush it just so I can finish the song. A beautiful verse comes to mind, a verse that has been a stronghold for Perze and me when we were not yet married, but had so many doubts about where our lives together were headed.
Habakkuk 2:3 “For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end—it will not lie. If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay.”
Habakkuk the prophet wrestled with his belief, or disbelief, that God would rescue them, when the condition of Judah was surrounded by evil and destruction. He questioned why God was silent, why God was taking too long to deliver His people. But God, in His sovereignty, knew everything that Habakkuk didn’t know, and even though God knew Habakkuk’s disheartened spirit was broken and desperate, He let him wait. Habakkuk was too shortsighted, but God did give him assurance amidst his pain. Now, honestly, the contrast of waiting for a house to the dire needs of Judah is surely unequal, and embarrassingly laughable, but God’s timing is never wrong. In our case, our family’s minute corner that is our world as of now is at this crossroad. But it is one that would open doors for the bigger things we want to accomplish for our family and friends. We are hopeful and swatting the moths of doubt to honor the timing.