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(written 2002)

you have granted what i’ve never expected
asked, i’ve never requested
but granted it came
hands of time and Your hand’s all the same
my shame, my blame was always my faith
i’ve complained under my breath when
you knew all along the truth
that my best was in You.
the truth was in You.

my vision is short sighted
i was never delighted, my fight
was that i could not get past
the next corner, next night, next height
i sighed below mountains
and lingered in valleys, looking up
on impossibilities, on realities
revoking Your past miraculous merciful mysteries

my praise became dull
obligatory lulls for my own comfort in full
they exited my mouth, down they dropped
propped up, then fell south
they only reached the depth of my doubt

but You’ve shown me my folly
if only i dealt with my pride, solely
inside
if only
i trusted, and abided,
guided by your mercy and set me free
You would lift me, and i could dance
forever in the river advance
to You, my redemption, salvation,
You, in You, my soul’s satisfaction.

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