having been married at 24, and living in the east coast doesn’t give one ample community within similar married women. i clung to my friends who weren’t married, but also wished to share experiences of married women. one conversation w/ one of my closest guy friends even mentioned how there was some unspeakable distance there was because of his lack to relate to that side of me, even though we remained pretty close. it was a tough thought to swallow even for the youth group i involved myself with since i was in my teens. they really knew me as a solitary entity, without perze, without ties or marital responsibilities. i’m just really glad my sister got married the same year. it really helped w/ that “community” problem, and even better because we were already close to begin with.
this year, surprisingly enough, people decided it would be the perfect year to get married. in my own circle of friends, there are five. yes FIVE. Five, as in five fingers of your hand, FIVE, and three within merely 2 weeks of each other, and 2 of those weddings we’ll be participating in. so let’s break that down:
5 weddings- 2008
4 weddings- within 4 weeks
3 weddings- within 2 weeks of each other
2 weddings- emma and i are part of the wedding entourage
1 wedding- perze is part of the wedding entourage
nearing the 4th year of our marriage, perze and i can’t wait until we’ve reached our tenth! we’re still considered to be novices compared to successful marriage veterans, but i can’t imagine that this year is just the beginning for these couples, despite the prolonged dating phases they might have had. truly, there is that universal challenge within the first years of your marriage, the one that can either start the breakdown or encouragement of communication. it’s definitely the season you really learn to handle fights with each other, because you really have no where to go after the melee, except the spare bedroom.
you also learn about roles and who becomes what personality in the home. basically, you take the existing formula from the dating period and multiply that ten-fold. so, if you were the whiner, the screamer, the temper-flared, and the bossy, chances are, those are the things that will really show. and if you’re the quiet, submissive, pushover, catering-to, kind of person, that’ll exponentially show. you’ll really see who will lead your family and what roles you fill, who your schedule will revolve around, etc. you also realize that the tiny things that annoyed you in your dating phase are the things that will REALLY annoy when you’re married. that’s why it’s so important to be responsible to each other the first year or so, to really help each other adjust best and cling to God for wisdom.
but with all thoughts aside, i’ve decided to do one post on their wedding websites, all from different services (just in case you’re planning on your own “www”).
||check our “beehive” for the wedding links.
it’s even more insane what we get in the mail: (X-engagement party invites+ 5save the date cards+ 5shower invites+ 5wedding invites) !