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under an empty chasm fetus-like from your silence aged to your experience born only to the ocean and spat to the shore coughing for the waves a bird who longs to swim
Month: July 2002
Phonecalls & Home
***beep, beep, beep*** chesa:: hello? hello? pam? hello? ugh! *redial* pam:: hello? chesa:: hello? pam:: he~llo~~? chesa:: hello? pam? pam:: hello? chesa:: hello? pam? pam:: hello? ya? chesa:: my phone’s gonna die so here’s the number… pam:: huh? what? you’re breaking… chesa:: hello? *beep, beep, beep* (phone hangs up) chesa:: ugh!!! *puts phone down while driving* chesa:: (looking at her phone) wait til i get a new phone! you are soooo gone… *phone says nothing back* chesa:: why can’t you work for me? at least for over 10 minutes??? what in the world? *phone continues in silence* chesa:: (looks back at the phone) oooo…watch..i’m soooo gonna get rid of you soon…you are so gone. ********************************* things are bad when you start talking to inanimate objects… ********************************** |0726| dear friends i know i haven`t been updating. if you saw my schedule, you`d see why. the past 3 weeks have been grueling, but God is still good, i believe. there`s so much work 2 be done 4 BASIC, so if anyone wants 2 help out, please contact me. it would be greatly appreciated…all planning 4 it have been detered from a passing away of one of our dearest brothers in Christ & […]
Day 5: DVBS
i want to write this before the moment passes and my senses are diluted with distractions. tonite was day 5 of DVBS. This is usually the hardest day for me cuz i have to fit a lesson in, as well as stressing the importance of salvation. I’ve had the same kids for four years now, and i’ve seen them all grow in their salvation, and i didn’t know how i was going to convey God’s love to them in a newer light, in a different angle. So i turned off the lights at the end of our Bible study and asked them to listen to a song. “Love Song” by Third Day. After they listened to it, i asked them for their personal interpretations to which they unanimously responded of a man who loved God so much that he would do anything just to be with Him. After i gave them a chance to respond, i shared a personal story of how i came to hear the song and what the song represented in my life- a time of sadness and desperation, a season that encompassed my weakness and strength, a time of pivotal understanding that no matter what happens […]
Vision…
days have been busy but God still makes time for God :). mel and i was praying for vision today, and when i went downstairs to the computer, i kept looking at the BASIC flyer. I just kept staring at it, thinking about what God wants, thinking about how to maximize the nite. I know i can only do so much that the senses will take in, but it’s God who weaves in the heart. but i want to do my end of God’s vision. This has been my prayer these days, that God will show me what He wants. I want to dream big, even for a small church. I need to expect great things…the greater the risk in faith, the greater His glory in faithfulness, all according to His will. After this busy week, it’s time to sit down, rest, then mobilize.
The Madness Is Over
this week has been trying, i admit…emotionally and physically. I talked to pastor jus last nite and he said, “i know you’re tired, i can see it in your face…” I guess at those moments when i’m not running around, truth of the matter kicks in. ps- and would you know it? after knowing pastor justin (who wasn’t always “pastor Justin”) for 17 years, last nite in Pre-BASIC was the first time we have ever sung together at the pulpit. I was amazed and humbled…Hoy! Pastor Jus…what did God do to you those 3 years in seminary! Ambisioso ka na! LOLS…kidding…all joking aside, that was one of the greatest personal blessings that night. Ya Pre-BASIC…3 other personal blessings were Jamil. Eric. and Perze. why. mmm. they traveled the longest. haha…in addition, they shared with us their original compositions (except Jams). To know you guys traveled such distance for just Pre-BASIC is encrouaging. I wonder what God had in plan when He called you to our fellowship. Lastly, Ate Grace called me this sunday morning. Actually, we talked Wednesday about my future position in the choir. She confirmed her hopes to depart to VA permanently in September. Sadly, i listened and […]
Dance Before You Sleep
she wakes up. she turns on her radio to her favorite station. “Love At First Site” -Kylie Minogue she opens her eyes to its fullest size & begins her routine eye scratching. she yawns & stretches her arms to the lazy ceiling. the beat gets heavier & she begins moving to the 4/4 beat, still a little dizzy from the late night on the phone. she recalls some words that stuck out like metal objects to a magnet. she tries to understand what happened yesterday so she can make sense of today. she remembers her friend complaining about britney spears, comparing her abs to the pop diva. she wondered how the nite had grown so late from a conversation. she remembers laffing about an inside joke, and lets out an overdue giggle. the music absorbs her remaining sleepiness and her dancing gets more sporadically convulsing to its beat. She spontaneously jumped on her unexpecting bed and began dancing like a madman without purpose. the phone rings and she answers to a familiar voice from last nite. it`s her friend. she hears the same song faintly in the background of her friend`s side of the line. she lets out an unusual […]
Grace & Rodel
i miss ate grace and kuya rodel. they led the DVBS last year and it was always so much fun with them, seeing them smile, hearing their words of encouragment, making them laff. It’s still okeys this year, but i always admired their tag-team play :). kuya rodel, thank you for every word you have given me, from your blunt criticisms to your words of advice to your random teasings. you never miss an opportunity to pray for me at the most needed times. i remember when you had prayed for me & we both ended up crying. that will remain in my stories of you. ate grace. one song that always comes to mind when i think of you, “when praise demands a sacrifice”…you have been such an example for me in this. I’ve seen you go through so much with the music ministry and you have such great silent strength. you have always believed in me ate grace…even when i was younger and wasn’t that good in conducting or playing…thank you for the encouragement, for your smiles, your hugs, and your belief. i love you guys.